By Puja

Do you remember the old Andy Rooney segments from 60 minutes?

 

A major network had a man giving a 2-3 minute rant on something random at the end of their most popular news show EVERY week. I watched one where it was legit about how he got enough sleep (and the B-Roll was  images of him asleep in various places), one where he listed the names of 15 punny beauty salons only to focus on the word “beauty,” and the above (from a 2009 episode)…which I think is about calendars and TV schedules. America enjoyed these “few minutes” with old Andy for 33 years (1978-2011).

Guess what? Welcome to

PUJA RANTS IN 1,000 WORDS OR LESS

In IDGAF News

I was driving home from my play date with my intelligent, extremely brave, creative and loving niece (oh and her mom, my BBBFF) when I heard on the radio that Pop Songstress/Actress is for sure dating Current It Singer because she posted a picture of herself wearing his hoodie on some social media outlet. Here was my reaction:

Can I honestly ask this question and not get pelted with stones or something?

Who the fuck cares?

I mean I am the biggest proponent of self-care and distractions from the news of the world around you, but I wonder what kind of society we could build where the local radio station told you more about actual things that matter than what celebrities are allowing themselves to be photographed together?

What are some important things that happened today instead of pointless couple announcements that only matter until the end of summer or that collaboration project is released? Well below is what Google, Twitter and BuzzFeed News show as the top stories.

Literally ANYTHING ELSE MATTERS.

Straight [White] Men – What Are You Involved In?

• Healthcare – You straight up tried to “fix” something that wasn’t broken (but in need of repair) without professional input or case studies or anything because you just hated the ACA (i.e., President Obama) that much. What I don’t understand about the Healthcare debate is why isn’t the focus on the insurance companies? You know the ones who are setting prices and making profits…them. Why isn’t healthcare more affordable? How come an MRI costs $2,600 in the US but about $450 (without insurance) in South Korea? WHAT ACCOUNTS FOR THE DIFFERENCE? Shouldn’t that require some further examination instead of playing partisan politics with people’s lives?

• Military Corruption – Ya’ll, the Navy involved in the ‘Fat Leonard‘ scandal (how many hookers???) and the Marines are embroiled in a nude photo sharing scandal. I feel like it is safe to say the women are the victims in both cases here (and before you come for me, my type of Feminism respects women who choose to make their living with their bodies, but often times, especially in Southeast Asia, many women don’t get a choice  – even then I respect them, not the people trafficking them). And finally, when are we going to use the T word with Michael Flynn?

• Blowhards in Congress – This Racist, this Clueless Asshole, and this Useless Turd

• And Orangemort released his own taxes…it’s stamped “Client Copy” (where is the slap your own face emoji?).

I can hear some of you thinking Top 40 Radio isn’t NPR Puja what are you on about?

First, if I can hear your thoughts, I’m in your head, so HA! Second, and what? Is that an excuse to go through life thinking that the world revolves around celebrities? That implies that you will only dip in and dip out of resistance, real world, or your own ass when it is convenient for you. You will forget that there are real people with real lives out there being affected by real things BUT YOU KNOW WHICH CELEBRITY IS FAKE NEWSING US WITH THEIR INDUSTRY CREATED LOVE LIFE.

I am well aware that I sound like I should probably be at a street corner holding a “The End Is Nigh” signs.

But it kind of is.

• It’s the 7 year anniversary of the Syrian war.
• Hate Crimes against Muslims and Brown People are on the rise
• Women’s Reproductive Rights are being shrunk at an alarming rate
• Scarlett Johansson joins Tilda Swinton as women willing to participate in the White-Washing of Asians in film in 2017
• The Fed is about to increase interest rates
• Black Lives STILL Matter
• Kids aren’t being allowed to go to the bathroom without fear of bullying
• ICE is rounding up people in the streets like cattle wranglers herd cattle
• The last of the #NODAPL protesters left weeks ago due to pipeline construction
• The few women in the current cabinet are quantifiably setting women back decades
• A judge is being investigated for a pattern of lenient sentences given to young rapists in Iowa (bastion of equality that state is turning out to be)
• A GROWN ASS MAN SHOVED HIS CROTCH IN THE FACE OF A STATUTE OF A YOUNG WOMAN IN NYC and some people need it explained why that promotes rape culture
• The White House is full of Russian spies and people are still asking for “patience”

But you don’t want the real world to encroach on your escapism.

Wait, you have the privilege of having 100% escapism? Wow. Can I get some of that? Because I can’t stop being a Brown Woman, my victimization could come at any time and my fear is palpable. So when I hear that the fodder the people paid to chatter in between songs and commercials talking about things that we absolutely should not care about as much as we once did, I get a little frustrated.

And then I put my AUX cord into my phone and turn on my streaming music service or a podcast about all the symbolism in “Get Out,” because who the fuck cares right?

(970 words).