You Shall Not Covet

by Laura

I committed a sin. I broke a rule. I am still breaking it, and it’s not just a rule, it’s an effing Commandment. Now before you go getting your judgmental Judy books out or a calling the police, it was number 10. Not up to speed on you Commandments? Look at you throwing rocks whilst living in a glass house.

Good ol’ Number 10 that Moses brought down from that mountain was about coveting. Wanting what is forbidden unto you or being jealous over what your neighbor has but you don’t.

So what am I coveting that I cannot have? In short: alcohol. I miss it. I didn’t know I missed it until every freaking no-no list in every freaking pregnancy book tells you to abstain. You know in Europe, they encourage women to continue to drink? Not 3-day benders or anything, but the occasional glass to calm the eff down. Oh to be European.

I live in Texas and it’s hot. No, this isn’t news, but when it’s hot and you’re full of nerves, and hormones, and swelling, and sweltering, and everyone else around you cools off with spritzers, and margaritas, and frosty beverages, and even beer, and you’re sitting there with your iced tea, you hear the sad violin music playing just for you.

My husband was digging for something and came across an empty rum bottle. He raised it questioningly and looked at me. Yes, goddammit, I emptied it, but that was at least 2015. The closest thing to alcohol I’m come near is the communion juice at church (my church serves both cran-grape juice and the real stuff; they try to make it clear, but I get so worked up I always forget. It’s a thimble-full people and my first born shows no ill effects, yet).

My favorite is Sangria. It’s red wine with fruit and maybe brandy. I had to real stuff when I went to Spain a long long time ago. To make it, you chop up various fruits (orange, lemon, lime, apples, peaches) and soak them in red wine. Me personally, I let it steep without the sweetener and just let it chill. When you’re ready to serve, add sugar, or honey, or lemonade, or, when you’re in a hurry, just add sprite. You can serve over ice and you’ve got a perfect Spanish (or Portuguese) summer refreshment. You can drink it on a patio, in the air conditioning, with paella, alone, or with friends. The possibilities are endless.

See you read those instructions and now you’re thirsty or you’re thinking of your favorite mojito recipe. It’s okay. Go ahead and drink. You have my blessing. I promise to wipe the drool off my lip as long as you promise that around December or January, we share something tasty together.

Laura 8-1



  • Red Wine
  • Chunky Chopped Fruit (orange, lemon, lime, peaches)
  • Brandy (or you can just use bourbon)
  • Sweetener (sugar, honey, sprite)
  • Ice

Add your wine and fruit in large pitcher. I like to let it chill for a few hours. Add brandy / bourbon, no set amount, you will know your taste buds. Add the sweetener. You can chill again, but at least point, hummena hummena. Pour over ice. Enjoy. (Note, the more you enjoy, the more you think you can speak Spanish like a native matador. Stay away from the bull fighting ring!)

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