When I first began dating my now-husband, this is the question a co-worker posed to me. My co-worker is a jovial old man on his second wife and lovingly refers to his single grandson as a ‘prize bull’ and his ten (10) granddaughters as ‘show heifers’. On paper that might read offensive, but in person, you can tell those little girls rule his world and he would lay down his life for them. This co-worker knew that in theory I wanted children. He wanted to make sure this ‘fella’ was worthy of me and knew my plans and was worthy of fathering my children. Well we had only been on 2 or 3 dates and reproducing was not exactly front and center in my mind.
When my husband and I found out we were having a son, I think we both relaxed. My husband knew what to expect from a boy: dirt and noise. I knew that I was off the hook (sort of) for showing a boy how to be a man (note: I fully acknowledge and accept the responsibility of teaching my son how to behave with /for/ to /around women and treat people in general. He will not make headlines like other buffoons recently or he will face me and several aunts!).
With my baby boy, my husband wrestles, hugs, reads, holds, and comforts. With his other scrawny adorable red-headed son, my husband talks, texts, pesters, putt-putts, and video games. This man is present in their lives. He is a constant they rely upon. This man, by simply doing, is setting an example for these boys on how to become men. This man laughs, cries, jokes, dances, and treats me with love and respect. This man is more than just a breeder; this man is a father / dad / daddy.
I love my husband as my husband and my partner, but I love my husband almost as much for being the father for my children.