I am not a fan of Valentine’s Day. If you are single you are made to feel incomplete and unloved. If you are not, this is the one day of the year (outside of your birthday) where someone is forced to shower you with affection, platitudes and gifts (and you reciprocate) as a societal “norm.” What makes February 14th such a stressful time? The answer is consumerism, but that is neither here nor there.
I have never had a true Valentine (shout out to spinsterhood). When I moved to America, my very first Valentine’s Day was met with three cards from my third grade classmates. Bless those three students who had decent parents. The rest of those turds can burn in hell. Since I have never had a valentine, I will use this time to write myself a love letter. In case you haven’t already picked up, I struggle with loving myself. Hopefully being my own Valentine leads to me engaging in self-love more regularly (both kinds you cheeky devil).
My Dearest Puja:
I miss you. I miss our long conversations about nothing in particular. I miss seeing your smile when you think no one is looking. The way your eyes crinkle in the corners signals that your entire being is mirthful. Your smile is infectious; people seem to always laugh when they are around you. Please try and find something in each day that brings you pleasure. You deserve joy.
I love how you get so excited about things you are interested in. You exude such confidence when you feel good about something. I hope you are allowing yourself to focus and be more creative. Your mind is so sexy. You have the ability to bring yourself and those around you up or down, embrace your power. You deserve passion.
Did you know that you are breathtaking? Yes you are. I am not speaking about physical beauty (but let’s not get it twisted, you are fly). Your soul is kind, generous and loving. You love your family and friends with such fierce loyalty, why can’t you do the same for yourself? No one is perfect, so stop wasting time trying to be. Stand up straighter, hold your head higher, and live with conviction. You deserve to feel beautiful.
I love you. I know I don’t always express it, but I do. Do not lay down in the despair that seems to be enveloping you like a shroud lately. You are enough. You can get through this. You come from a very long line of powerful women who made their way through trials and tribulations so you can be where you are today. Honor their lives and sacrifices, be a part of that legacy. I love you enough to fight for you. Promise me that you will fight too. Trust in yourself. You deserve to be loved.
Hope you are keeping up with your self-care routines because you deserve happiness.
Much Love, Nice You
PS – Do NOT buy any discount candy on the 15th. I mean it.
I am going to change this closer to Things Keeping Me Sane: I never thought I would say this, but running is legit yo. I find myself looking forward to running (my version of running). Maybe it is a phase, and next week my zen will be found watching paint dry… but that hour I am alone with my thoughts (and the sound of Jim Dale reading Harry Potter) is when I get some really good mindfulness exercises done. Added bonus, this ass will be ready for Summer 2016, so watch out.